Stay away from the 'House of Lies'

Don Cheadle. The man who wooed us over in “Hotel Rwanda” and “Crash,” — heck, even in “Ocean’s Eleven” as an explosive enthusiast — Cheadle’s charm always shows through his work. With Cheadle at the helm, as he is with the new 30-minute Showtime comedy “House of Lies,” you can’t go wrong, right?

Very wrong indeed, my friends.

But first, let’s go off course for a bit.

Showtime. It’s a network filled with characters we shouldn’t relate to, yet somehow we find ourselves living vicariously through them, time and time again.

We have Dexter Morgan, a vigilante serial killer with a “dark passenger”; Nancy Botwin, a drug-dealing mother simply trying to support her family; Hank Moody, a sex-aholic writer; and the Gallagher family, a bunch of gypsy thieves, among others. With “House of Lies” we can add money-hungry management consultants to the list.

And this is where Cheadle comes into play. Cheadle tackles the role of central character Marty Kaan, a cut-throat consultant who will do anything to land the client. Which is all good and well if his character wasn’t portrayed as a complete sleezball.

When we first meet Kaan, he is waking up next to his drugged-out ex wife - who happens to be his main competition in the consulting world. Following this shameful incident, we meet Marty’s other half, his pre-pubescent son who is discovering his other side of his sexuality — he really wants to nab the role of Sandy in his elementary school’s performance of “Grease” — to which Marty tries to ignore. And that’s just in the first five minutes.

Cheadle, an actor so refined, really takes a big step down with this role. What’s written for him is an over-the-top, sloppy, crude and disrespectful guy to all those involved. Including another fine actress who gets pulled into the “House of Lies” undertow, Kristen Bell — of “Veronica Mars” and “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” fame. Bell plays Jeannie Van Der Hooven, an Ivy-leaguer and right-hand woman to Kaan within his team of consultants — which also includes “Parks and Recreations” actor Ben Schwartz and Australian actor Josh Lawson, as Clyde and Doug, respectively. Bell’s character is meant to be strong and independent, but she’s so entwined with Marty in the overall scheme of things, that it creates a turn-off. I realize that Showtime is a prolific network, but Bell can do so much better.

It’s a fast-paced world when it comes to management consulting — which is probably why “House of Lies” feels the need to stop every five minutes or so in freeze-frame style and explain things to us, a tactic that gets real old, real fast — and I think the creators of “House of Lies” will soon come to find that it’s all a little too much. Viewers aren’t going to want to sympathize with Marty’s character as they do with other Showtime faves. Unless the creators of “House of Lies” can clean the show up a bit and make it smarter rather than sleazier, than I’m sorry to say the creators are the ones lying to themselves if they think “House of Lies” will make it past a first season.

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“House of Lies” debuts tomorrow at 9 p.m. on Showtime, but if you want to take a look sooner, though I highly recommend you don’t waste your time, TVGuide.com is showing the first episode online for free.